"Old Habits"

Tove Lo Habits (Stay High)

Sometimes music is the best form of expression, when trying to explain why we do/did the things we do/did (In my case did). I came across this song, and decided to put it in the blog because it so beautifully describes my past, and the deep emotions I used to feel. I'm using this post to "Go Back to Those Places" because I know there are so many people in "That Place" right now, and I want to reassure them, "Yes''. I was there too. "No". I am no longer there. "Yes". The Lord saved me, and He does Save, Redeem, and shows Infinite Grace.

Lyrics:
I eat my dinner in my bathtub
Then I go to sex clubs
Watching freaky people gettin' it on
It doesn't make me nervous
If anything I'm restless
Yeah, I've been around and I've seen it all

I get home, I got the munchies
Binge on all my Twinkies
Throw up in the tub
Then I go to sleep
And I drank up all my money
Dazed and kinda lonely

You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
                                                                                                                   

Pick up daddies at the playground
How I spend my daytime
Loosen up the frown,
Make them feel alive
I'll make it fast and greasy
I'm numb and way too easy

                                                  
You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh                                       ( Yep...that's me 5 years ago)
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

Staying in my play pretend
Where the fun ain't got no end
Ooh
Can't go home alone again
Need someone to numb the pain
Ooh

Staying in my play pretend
Where the fun ain't got no end
Ooh
Can't go home alone again
Need someone to numb the pain

You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

To me the "high" she is referring to can be alcohol, sex, drugs, or any other "vice". Many people use something to numb the pain of loss, and that comes in many forms. For me, the "you" could be a person, place, or even a thing...whatever we form a deep connection with.

This song nails addiction/depression

on the "hit".